I automatically go for the worst possible women ever. I don't know if it is because I know that there is no chance that a relationship will form or if I just enjoy actually being accepted by someone.
My lick has not been good lately or my confidence hasn't been up. I know I deserve someone great and someone who will appreciate me for me. However, I still have it in the back of my head that I don't deserve a great woman. Not after the pain I have put so many through. So I date the bad one's.
The last woman and I had nothing in common. Is not a Christian, goes to dstrip clubs, drinks like a fish. PASS.
Yet, I still asked her out for a second date. I think I am just getting lonely and will settle for any companionship. It could be that my best friend AND my little brother are getting married next Saturday. I actually had the nerve to call my mom and ask her if I could not go. Maybe just fly to the beach for the weekend.
She said she would kill me if I did.
However, this evening, as I was watching a movie (chick flick) with some friends from church, I started to realize that what I see in these love stories IS what I want. I want the impossible love that when you think it will never happen, it happens.
until then, i am loving my relationship with God
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